I had a swinging friend come to me for advice yesterday and her query was one that I think quite a few swingers probably have.

Her ‘problem’ was that she isn’t always in the mood for sex but, because she generally enjoys sex so much (and let’s face it, you have to be if you’re gonna join the swinging lifestyle) she worries that there’s something wrong with her, to the point where she was actually thinking she might even be bi-polar.

I assured her that she had absolutely no reason to worry - that I seriously doubt there’s a swinger alive who’s up for it 100% of the time and that women, especially, are likely to have strong variations in their sex drive.

I certainly don’t feel like it all of the time, and neither does Malc. In fact, that’s one of the reasons why we first decided we were happy to allow each other to swing alone, because that way we weren’t dependent on swinging only during the time when both of us were ‘up for it’.

Our energy levels change depending on how busy we’ve been, the demands on our work/families and how our hormones are acting. Some also say that biorhythms play a role although I have to admit to not knowing anything about that.

Anyway, the point is, don’t worry just because you don’t feel like swinging 100% of the time. There’s nothing wrong with you, you’re just being human.

Sadie xxx

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swinging uk