I try to answer as many questions as possible through this blog and one of the questions I’ve recently been asked is whether or not open marriages are the same as swinging.
First of all, let me say that I interpret “open marriage” to mean a marriage where each partner can have sex with whoever they want, whenever they want, and without the other necessarily having to be present or even know about the encounter.
The answer to the question is a tricky one. Malc and I have an open marriage to a degree. We’re both free to have sex with others but we do have restrictions. We can only have sex with others who are members of the swinging community and who both of us are acquainted with and trust. And we have to be honest about what we’ve done. Any kind of secrecy would ruin our relationship.
In my opinion, and this is ONLY my opinion, an entirely open marriage is NOT the same as swinging. Swinging is generally an activity that both couples participate in. If one partner wants to have sex with others outside of the swinging community then problems can, and often do, arise.
Obviously, I can’t tell you what to do but I would advise caution if your partner suggests an open marriage rather than controlled swinging. The ultimate decision, however, has to be yours.
Sadie xxx
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