I’d just like to thank Adam for his email asking whether there’s anything he and his girlfriend should consider before taking the plunge and visiting a swingers club. Thanks, Adam. That’s a very good question.

The answer is yes, there are several things that ought to be considered.

1. Consider how you’re going to feel when you see your partner, not only having sex with somebody else, but actually enjoying sex with a stranger.

2. Why are you considering swinging? Is it to please yourself, your partner, or because you both truly want to swing?

3. Are you able to be 100% honest with each other all of the time? Honest is, believe me, very important to swinging couples.

4. When you’re being honest, are you happy to hear and accept an honest answer, even if it isn’t necessarily the answer you want to hear?

5. Will you be able to keep your partner’s wellbeing in mind at all times whilst swinging? It’s important that you don’t get so carried away that you become oblivious to your partner’s needs.

6. And possibly the most important of all, will you be able to say “I love you” to your partner and mean it after you’ve watched them enjoy sex with somebody else?

Of course, it can be difficult to know beforehand exactly how you’ll react to seeing your partner have sex with a stranger but it’s important you’ve both thought it through thoroughly before you “take the plunge”. Don’t be too worried, though. Many, many couples happily swing and have wonderful relationships – it’s just important you know whether or not swinging’s really for you or whether it’s just a nice fantasy.

Sadie xxx