If you and your partner are new to swinging you’ll probably want to discuss your experiences after you’ve met another couple for play. This is perfectly normal and even something that should be encouraged as it’ll help both of you to understand what areas of swinging you’re comfortable with and not.
Think about and discuss the following:
- Were you comfortable with those you were swinging with and would you like to meet them again?
- Did your code words work? (code words should be decided upon beforehand and will help you let each other know whether you’re feeling uncomfortable with something)
- Which part of the evening did you enjoy most?
- Would you like to meet the couple as ’straight friends’? In other words, would you like to go to the cinema/bowling/restaurant with them without sex being part of the evening?
- Were you happy with the rules that were set beforehand?
- Were we happy playing in that particular environment?
- And the million pound question: do we want to play with them again?
Discussing the evening’s events will help you both understand why you want to swing and what you want out of it. It’ll also help you bond as a swinging couple, something that’s different to the bond you otherwise have.
Even after many years of swinging, Malc and I still discuss events afterwards. We mostly have an instinctive understand of what the other likes now but, even so, we find that talking about it afterwards brings us closer together and has become a way of making the evening last longer.
Sadie xx
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