Ok guys, admit it, you love a woman to take care of her pubes don’t you? Even if she doesn’t remove them all, you still like her to keep them tidy, right? Well how about you? Isn’t it up to men to do the same to keep their women happy?

In my opinion, too many men just don’t care enough about their own pubes. Personally, I’d much rather go down on a guy who has a nice smooth shaft than one that has hairs halfway up it! Yuk!! And yet soooo many guys don’t care! Why is this? Do you think we like men that look like apes?

Let me tell you now, after doing my own personal survey amongst female friends from all age groups, the overall consensus is that men should shave! Some would like to see men take all their hair away but the majority just want them to tidy up. A little less length around the sack, and a smooth shaft please.

Is that really too much to ask for?

I don’t particularly like men who look like boys so prefer my men to keep some hair but a tidy up is a MUST.

I’ve written about the subject before — you can read it here — but it appears far too few of you have taken any notice.

Come on guys. Stop expecting of us what you’re not willing to give yourselves, eh?

Sadie xx

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uk swingers

One of the questions I’m often asked is what BDSM is. Most people have heard of it but few outside the scene actually understand it.

First of all, BDSM stands for Bondage & Discipline (BD), Dominance & Submission (DS) and Sadomasochism (SM) and refers to any combination of these things.

If you tie your lover to the bed with silk scarves then you’re practising BDSM. If you spank him or her with a paddle, you’re practising BDSM. If you drip hot wax on your partners penis then you’re practising BDSM and if you attach nipple clamps to your woman then you’re also practising BDSM. In other words, a lot of activities are covered by BDSM even though the majority tends to think of it as being all whips, chains and rubber.

What’s essential in BDSM play is that there’s at least one submissive and one dominant person. Some people like to be submissive all of the time, and some like only to be dominant. Others like to switch between the submissive and dominant roles, depending on their mood and desires at the time.

The strange thing is, even those who turn their noses up at BDSM, believing that it’s just for weirdo kinky types, generally practise some form of BDSM at times, but without actually realising it. If you’ve ever tied your partner up or blindfolded him or her, then you’ll have practised BDSM. If you’ve ever so much as demanded they lay entirely still while you smother them in cream and lick it off, then you’ll have practised BDSM. It’s strange to think that a form of sexual pleasure that’s often considered to be a niche activity enjoyed by a few ‘pervy types’ is actually something that most of us enjoy in some form or another!

Sadie xxx

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bdsm

Ok guys, it’s time to learn how to use your tongue in order to give a woman the ultimate pleasure. Sit down, get comfortable, and listen to Auntie Sadie.

Far too many men are loath to get down between a woman’s legs and start tonguing her because they’re afraid they’re going to do it wrong. Well listen up, guys. The chances of getting it wrong are about as great as the chance of finding a five pound note in whore’s knickers. It could happen, but it’s unlikely.

Women absolutely adore having their pussies licked. They love feeling your tongue run along the vulva, love feeling it dig around inside their vaginas, love feeling it lap their clitoris… in other words, they well and truly LOVE IT!

Try holding her lips open while you suck on her clitoris in much the same way as you’d suck ice cream off your finger. The clitoris is an extremely sensitive area, with just as many nerve endings as a man has in his glans but in a far more concentrated area, so don’t go tugging on it like a wild man. Suck gently at first and gradually build up as you feel her react to you.

Push your tongue inside her – in, out, around and around. Really taste her. There’s a reason this is called ‘eating pussy’. Think about it and do just that. Devour her.

There’s absolutely no reason why you shouldn’t go down on your lady and enjoy the taste of her paradise. It’s clean, it’s beautiful and it tastes divine!

Sadie xxx

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oral sex

Well here we are, enjoying some free living with our friends Lita and John, and after a hot exchange of oral sex with John, I got to thinking that I really ought to post about safe oral sex.

Everybody knows that nasty stuff can be transmitted through penetration of the vagina or anus (don’t laugh at those words, d’ya hear me?) but what about good old cunnilingus and fellatio? That’s licking and sucking, in case you don’t know.

Let’s get one thing clear – the risk of HIV being transmitted during oral sex is FAR lower than it is during penetration, especially for the person being licked or sucked, but for the one doing the business, if you let a man cum in your mouth or go down on a woman who’s menstruating, then your risk increases A LOT. I would never let a man I didn’t know very well to cum in my mouth and I’d never go down on a woman who’s bleeding. In the case of giving a bloke a blow job, if he likes to shoot in the mouth then he’d have to wear a condom and pretend. Sorry, but there are no compromises there! Safety comes first.

It’s also worth considering herpes, even though it’s most likely to spread when the person giving head has an outbreak in the form of a cold sore. Believe me, I’ve seen genital herpes and it isn’t nice so if your partner has a cold sore, keep them away!

Right… back to my friends for some fun.

Sadie xxx

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safe oral sex

Thinking of arranging your first swingers party? If you are, then that’s good because that means you’ve made some nice swinging friends with whom you have an evening of sexy fun to look forward to.

One of the things I’ve often noticed when I’ve attended parties hosted by first timers is that the lighting isn’t always right. Lighting, more than anything, really sets the mood.

How you light your house will depend entirely on what kind of party you’re arranging: a BDSM party would require a completely different ambience to a vanilla party which again might require something different to a fetish party. And depending on the fetish you’re going with, the lighting could change then, too.

Candles are almost always a good bet but avoid harsh overhead lighting whenever possible – it casts too many shadows and shows up every imperfection. Better to let your guests look as good as possible!

Sadie xxx

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swingers parties

This job is, without a shadow of doubt, one of the best I’ve ever had. The people are great fun, the atmosphere’s second to none and even the pay’s decent. But do you know what I really like about this job? You lot!

I love the feedback I get. I’ve had emails telling me how much you look forward to reading my posts, emails thanking me for some piece of advice I’ve given that’s helped you along the swinging path, and sometimes the mail is just to say hi and to let me know that you’re out there.

We had to turn off the comments because, unfortunately, they were getting spammed. As you can no doubt imagine, the world and his ferret soon realised how popular this blog is and decided it’d be a good place to leave their crap advertisements for viagra, cialis, second rate porn sites and all sorts of junk you’d never believe. It’s a shame because it would have been great to have your feedback through the comments, but I just don’t have the time to keep clearing out the rubbish.

BUT… because I like to know how you feel about the blog, I’m always happy to receive email. If you’d like to drop me a line at any time, please feel free to do so on “sadie [at] adult-connexxxions [dot] co [dot] uk”. I’ve had to split the addy up like that because of the spam bots, but you can figure out how to use it, can’t you?

Looking forward to hearing from you.

Sadie xxx

uk swingers

A new report shows that 8 of 10 British teenagers have sex for the first time whilst drunk and that, more often than not, they don’t use contraception. No wonder we’re topping the charts when it comes to unwanted pregnancies!!

I have to admit that my first time was also under such circumstances. I was 16, at a friend’s party, and as pissed as a polecat.

I’d always been a flirt so nobody was surprised when I spent the whole evening flirting with her older brother’s mate, Bob. He was pretty damned gorgeous as being as he played rugby, had a body that just about any girl in her right mind would want to get her hands on. And let’s face it, at 16 your hormones are all over the place and those that steer the sex drive are running wild!

I’ve no idea how much vodka I drank that evening but it was definitely far more than I was capable of handling and before I knew it, I was in my friend’s brother’s bedroom, half naked on the bed, being humped by Bob.

Was it good? Was it heck! The room was spinning, I thought I was going to puke all over him and it was bloody painful. Definitely not the best way for a girl to lose her virginity and it took me a long time to learn just how good sex could actually be.

If 80% of our teens are doing anything similar, I feel sorry for them. The first time should be the first step on the path of a long, healthy and satisfactory sex life but I can see quite a few getting the wrong end of the stick and being put off before they even get started.

We need to talk to our kids. Not give them the moral finger that says “wait until you find the one“, but explain to them how important it is to wait until the moment’s right, regardless of who they choose to have sex with. If it’s a one night stand, fair enough – just as long as they really want it.

Sadie xxx

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teenage sex

Being as yesterday’s post was about giving head, I thought I’d offer you a few tips on making oral sex more exciting. Up for that? Of course you are!

Chilling
Regardless of which sex you’re pleasuring, try popping an ice cube in your mouth before you head south. The sensation is one of the most erotic I’ve experienced and I’ve yet to find anybody who hasn’t enjoyed it.

Warming
Opposite of the above – drink some warm tea or coffee before homing in on your partner’s cookie. Better still, suck some ice first and then drink some warm tea – both sensations following one another can’t be a bad thing!

Sing A Little Song
Ok, you don’t have to sing, but if you hum a tune while you’re down between a woman’s thighs you’ll have her reaching those dizzy heights in no time. It’s the vibration, y’know! Of course, there’s no reason why you shouldn’t try it on a man, but in my experience it’s the ladies who are most likely to react positively to this one.

Kiss and Swirl
This one’s simple as all you need do is imagine your man’s penis is an ice cream cone. Lick it in the same way and watch his reaction.

Oral sex is one of the most erotic ways of being brought to climax and making it more exciting can only be a good thing. Go for it!

Sadie xxx

oral sex

I can hardly believe the number of women and men who still believe that female ejaculation is a myth! Yes, that’s right – some women believe it too!

Because not all women experience ejaculation, some are unwilling to believe it happens at all, even though they’ve spoken to both men and women who will testify to having experienced it. The thing is, when a woman ejaculates it feels as if she’s going to pee so a lot of women hold back, believing that they’re about to embarrass themselves. Female ejaculate and urine come from the same place, you see, only where pee originates in the bladder, ejaculate originates in the g-spot (skenes gland). Ejaculate is also thicker than urine and contains glucose and prostatic acid phosphatase, a major component of semen.

How much a fluid will spurt out depends on how hydrated the woman is and how much she pushes during ejaculation. While some women may only release a teaspoon or so, others may gush several cups full.

Most people incorrectly believe that female ejaculation is directly related to orgasm. While it’s true that women can and often do ejaculate during orgasm, they can release fluid without either a g-spot or clitoral orgasm.

It’s also been said that only women who have given birth are able to experience ejaculation but once again, this isn’t true. I should know! I ejaculate regularly but have never had a child!

If you’re a woman who finds herself releasing fluid during sex, don’t worry about peeing yourself as the likelihood of that happening is extremely low. In all probability you’re ejaculating!

Sadie xx

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female sexuality

Following on from yesterday’s post, I thought I’d share a few BDSM games with you. Obviously, this isn’t an extensive list – far from it – but the least I can do is share with you the games I’ve been involved in and that I’ve thought were fun.

Chopsticks – I was at a party once when a guy whipped a pair of chopsticks from the table (we’d had a Chinese meal beforehand), put one above and below my nipple and bound them together at each end with an elastic band (I’ve no idea where he found them!). The sensation was incredible and I’ve often since wondered what it would have been like if he’d done the same thing with my clitoris. Hmmm… must mention that to Malc!

Electric Toothbrush – Malc did this to me and I highly recommend you try it. Hold your electric toothbrush against your own or your partner’s clit and enjoy! Can also be used on the head of the penis.

Orgasm Denial – Often used by dom females on submissive men. There are hundreds of ways of doing this but the basic idea is always the same: to stop your partner from having an orgasm. How long you deny them is up to you. It can be an hour, a day or even a week. Keep them on the brink, though, for maximum fun.

Living Doll – I wonder if this was what Sir Cliff was thinking of when he sang about his living doll? Basically, one partner agrees to be the doll and is used in any way in order to bring satisfaction to the other partner who can place him/her in any position and take any action. The ‘doll’ mustn’t take an active role in any way whatsoever.

Public Undies – Send your partner to work, the shops, to the theatre or wherever wearing your underwear.

BDSM games are really only restricted by your imagination. If it involves a dominant and a submissive partner then it’s BDSM, regardless of whether it’s soft or hard play.

Most of us have enjoyed it at some time, and if we find the kind of BDSM games that are right for us, we can go on enjoying them for a long, long time.

Sadie xxx

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bdsm

I’ve always known that quite a few men use the services of prostitutes, not only because I’ve had friends who have had partners who have done it but because I have a friend who’s an escort and I know how busy she is, but that it was as high as 1 in 10 shocks me a bit.

That’s not a figure that’s been pulled out of a hat – it’s part of the results of a serious study of sexually transmitted diseases undertaken by the British Medical Journal.

Of those 1 in 10 men who pay for sex, half of them have used the services of prostitutes while abroad and 40% have use local services. Unbelievable, eh? Half while abroad? Is there something about travelling that makes men horny or what?

It’s not all bad though, because 58% of them have only ever done it once. I could forgive Malc one slip-up, but if he regularly used prostitutes and escorts then I’m afraid he’d soon be sending out change of address cards. Because 47% of those who have paid for sex have done while in a relationship, y’see.

I’ve no doubt there are a few people out there wondering why I would be bothered by this when I’m happy to let my other half go off to have sex with other women anyway, but believe me, what we do as swingers is something entirely different to him going behind my back and paying for a shag with our hard earned money!

It isn’t just about sex!

Sadie xx

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escort information

I have to admit that I quite like nice tight balls on a man but for some reason, a lot of men seem to think they’re not masculine enough and would prefer to have a pair that hang more. They say they like the feel of them being weighed in a partner’s hand and pulled on slightly, something that can’t really be done when the balls sit high.

Luckily, there are ways of helping the balls become more pendulous.

Take ball stretchers, for example. When used, they hold the balls down and allow them to be tugged – a sensation that I’ve understood is as good for men as having the nipples sucked is for women. These particular ball stretchers are available in two weights although, not being a man, I’ve no idea why.

Evidently, when only an old-fashioned type of ball stretcher was available, blokes had to thread the scrotal skin through the hole then follow up with the testes themselves. Because balls come in many different sizes, getting the size right was always a difficult issue. These new fangled ones are much easier to use, though. They’re hinged so you open them, lay the balls in place, and then close them comfortably.

So there you have it. If you’re a bloke who wants his bollocks to swing and sway a bit more than is the case at the present, get yourself one with a split collar ring and get stretching.

Sadie xx

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sex aids

Evidently the owner of a sex shop has applied to Stockport council for a licence to stay open between 12noon and 4pm on Sundays during the run up to Christmas. He also has a shop in Bury where there’s never been a problem with this before and says that those who work 6 day weeks should be given the opportunity to buy their fruity festive gifts on a Sunday along with those who are buying more traditional gifts.

Sadly, it looks as if his application is going to be refused. Why? Because there’s a Christian Book Shop on the opposite side of the road and the local vicar says that having both that and the sex shop open on a Sunday will be sending the wrong message.

Now let me make it clear that this is only my opinion, but wouldn’t allowing both shops to open being giving the message that we live in a tolerant, secular society rather than a society where only the needs of one particular minority are met?

Maybe I’m wrong but surely if we don’t start accepting sexual activity as normal then we’ll never truly move on?

Sadie xxx

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sex shops

Fruit’s good for you. In fact, it’s so good for you that the government recommend you eat at least 5 portions a day (you can mix it with veg but you know what I mean – it’s good for you).

But it’s not just good for eating straight from the fruit dish or as part of a salad; fruit’s great for getting sexy with, too.

Does the banana really need further introduction when it comes to its use in the bedroom? With or without its skin? I’m happy to use it either way: with its skin gives me more to thrust with but when its used without its skin and eaten straight out of the honey pot…mmmm… there’s something incredibly exciting about that!

But phallic shaped fruits aren’t the only fruits that can give cause for the bedroom windows to steam up. Cherries are a firm favourite in our house, too; a few pushed inside the vagina and then eaten out is an erotic experience for both partners.

Messy, mushy fruits can be spread over the breasts, vulva and penis and licked off. Try mashed peaches (ever noticed how they resemble a woman’s vulva?) or strawberries for this one.

My only warning is to be careful with what you push inside the vagina as any residue left could cause problems. Bananas are generally ok although you must be careful when using them unpeeled as they’ve been known to break off and fishing out the remains isn’t easy!

Remember that the membrane inside the vagina is sensitive so acidic fruits should be kept outside unless, as in the case of cherries, they have a thick skin that isn’t likely to break.

Next time you hear somebody say you should be getting at least five portions of fruit a day, head for the bedroom and have fun.

Oh, and don’t forget that bunch of grapes. The Romans knew how to be decadent!

Sadie xxx

uk swingers